How to Improve Your Marriage by Elevating Your Spouse

How to Improve Your Marriage by Elevating Your Spouse

No matter where your marriage stands, there’s always room for improvement. Try elevating your spouse to quickly see positive change!

Over the years, we’ve encountered couples of all ages, races, and stations in life. Some have had better relationships than others, but almost all have been through periods of relational struggles. So, what makes a happy marriage?

How to Improve Your Marriage by Elevating Your Spouse

Apparently time and experience alone don’t bring marital bliss. According to this article on a popular UK website for seniors, “an unhappy marriage in retirement is more common than you might expect.” It would seem if you want a good marriage, you have to work on it.

There is an endless amount of advice out there, and we’ve tried a lot of it. But I feel like we’ve finally learned some clear, life-changing truths about how to have a healthy relationship, like the power of elevating your spouse.

Recently, we have begun to see how the one most important factor that determines a person’s experience in every area of life is their identity.

How we see ourselves affects everything — especially our relationships. So, where do we get our identity? Our view of ourselves often comes from things like:

  • What the world says we must achieve to be successful
  • How culture tells us we should look and act
  • What our backgrounds were (or were not)
  • How we were treated by others in the past
  • The standards and expectations we set for ourselves

One of the strongest influences on our identity is the image that is reflected back to us by those closest to us.

As we grow and mature, the way we see ourselves changes. But sometimes the version reflected back to us by others doesn’t change at the same time. If we keep seeing ourselves as they see us, it’s hard break out of that box to become the person we want to be.

If my desire is for my marriage to be as healthy and happy as it can be, I need a healthy and happy spouse. While their mental and emotional health is ultimately their responsibility, I can choose to help them become the person they want to be. I can elevate my spouse by choosing to see him or her in the best possible light.

In our marriage, Bob and I are making a conscious effort to see each other as the new creations we want to be.

We have had many discussions about getting rid of any negative images we have from the past. We try to keep our focus on who we want be, and who we know we are inside.

As we do, the version of ourselves we see reflected from each other will align with the true, good, and perfect identity that is who we really are. And the more we see that person reflected back to us, the more we become that person.

That is elevating your spouse.

When we practice doing that for each other, our whole relationship is elevated. Why not give to a try? You might find it makes your marriage happier, healthier, and more pleasant for both of you!

Let us know what you think in the comments below. Or tell us about some ways you’ve practiced elevating your husband or wife.

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